Getting my Bindi Straight

सो, इफ इ एन्देद उप मोविंग टू लिटिल इंडिया, अस इ'म काल्लिंग माय न्यू पोतेंतिअल निघ्बोर्हूद, इ विल सुर्रौन्देद माय इंडियन वेद्डिंग शोप्स एंड ग्रोसरी स्टोर्स, अमोंग ओथेर थिंग्स.
अच्कोर्डिंग टू थिस अर्तिक्ले इन थे नयत'स इफ यू'रे थिंकिंग ऑफ़ लिविंग इन/इसेलिन, न.जे.; कर्री एंड सरिस स्पिस अ 'टिपिकल' सुबुर्ब: "

अत फर्स्ट ग्लांस, इसेलिन लूक्स मच लिके एनी ऑफ़ थे दोजेंस ऑफ़ स्लीप्य पोस्ट-वर्ल्ड वर ई सुबुर्ब्स ठाट मुश्रूमेद इन न्यू जर्सी दुरिंग थे १९५०'स. तिद्य रंचेस एंड कापे कोड्स स्टैंड साइड बी साइड ओं स्माल लोटस. थे तोवं इस अ कोम्मुटर'स ड्रीम, होम टू थे मेत्रोपर्क ट्रेन स्टेशन एंड जुस्त अ फेव मिनुतेस' ड्राइव टू थे गार्डन स्टेट पर्क्वय, न्यू जर्सी तुर्न्पिके एंड रौतेस १, ९ एंड २८७.

बुत अ क्लोसेर लुक रेवेअल्स ठाट इसेलिन, ओने ऑफ़ निने अरास ठाट मके उप वूद्ब्रिद्गे टाउनशिप, इस नोट यौर रन-ऑफ़-थे-मिल बेडरूम कोम्मुनिटी. इन थे लास्ट देकादे, थे दोव्न्तोवं बुसिनेस डिस्ट्रिक्ट ऑफ़ थिस मिद्द्लेसेक्स काउंटी हम्लेट -- सन्तेरेड अत ओक ट्री रोड एंड ग्रीन स्ट्रीट -- हस बेकोमे अ थ्रिविंग रेतैल मक्का फॉर इन्दिंस, व्हो फ्लोक्क हियर टू दिने ओं औत्हेंटिक इंडियन फ़ूड एंड टू शॉप इन थे मानी इंडियन ग्रोसरिएस, जेवेल्री स्टोर्स एंड साडी शोप्स."

Now this article was written almost six years ago but I have noticed on my weekend drive-bys that I have to avoid that main strip of road mentioned above if I want to get anywhere. I've been in search of a Weigman's that's in the area but it's on the mall side of Rt. 1. That's about the only domestic detail that's unknown.

I did however discover the great joy of shopping at the dollar store for every day things like tupperware and a plunger. Last Friday after work, I was at Metro Park Mall to make a return. I stopped by the $1 store to get party plates and ended up with a enormous bag of things, basically 20 things for $20!!! Now I don't expect these tuppers to last more than a couple zaps in the microwave (by the way, I"m holding on on buying one until I really think I need one!). Otherwise, I'm just being totally chill about the process, literally nothing is in my hands anymore, I just have to get ready to sign an endless amount of paperwork at closing...whenever that is...

The Five Stages of Emotions When Buying Your First Piece of Real Estate

1. Excitement(awe): Yay, I found the place I really really want! It's the perfect size, it's got white walls and it's perfect for my commute.

2. Determination: I sign a very long contract offer, put my good faith money in and wait.... for it to be accepted by the seller.

3. Consternation: Why is the Seller changing the terms of the contract? I mean it's his piece of real property to sell, but what happened in the last 72 hours that made him change course this directly?

4. Frustration: Seriously? You can't be bothered to let the inspector and appraiser onto the property. Is this b/c you said the first time I saw the property: I ain't fixin' nothin'? You had the nerve to not take my first offer seriously, even though it's now been determined to be the appraised value of the property.

5. Acceptance (zen state): One day I'm going to wake up and either be in this new place or I'm going to still be at home, with all my stuff in boxes. That's the bottom line.

I Dream of Anthony Bourdain

I know dreams are suppose to mean something but this one is still stumping me. Last night, I dreamed I was hanging out with Anthony Bourdain and he was asking me what he should make me for dinner. We discussed it and he made it, can't remember what it actually was though. He was really nice to me, ironically, but he had his typical potty mouth thing going on.

Sure enough the answer to my dream was in today's Food Section of the NYT's regarding the bad mouths of TV chefs. Of course, no surprised that "Top Chef" Tom claims he's totally above all that. But Bourdain simply said "I'm making a living at it". Now I'm not saying that I'm in love with him, but I guess I'm saying if a chef (sou or whatever) ever asked me out I'd say yes. Bourdain's already got his trophy wife half his age with a kid.

Nasty Gram

I think I've reached the end of my rope with attempting to get to closing on this condo I had my eye on. First the seller says "I ain't fixing nothing", then the keys didn't work when we tried to go in for the inspection, then he moved the closing date by 8 weeks, then he refused to let the appraiser in for over two weeks, and finally then the appraiser came back under-appraisal by a significant amount, ironically what I my first offer was to begin with.

So, here I am in a situation I wanted to avoid: walking away or going into to re-negotiate for the up-teenth time. I really, really want this place b/c of the location. I know it needs work, thank goodness the appraiser saw that bluntly. It's cosmetic, not structural, which is a good thing. I can handle up-grading over time, if and only if it increases equity. Walking away would include sending the seller a notice that he must repay my legal fees incurred up to present. Knowing how responsible he's been from the get go (he treated the house with minimal care, much like his personal life I suspect based on all his chatting the first time I saw the place), I don't expect to get my money back without a fight.

I think I'll try further south, near P-town and see what else is on the market. I just hope my realtor's game to start all over again but my motivation right now is z-e-r-o.

Yeah I Love You Too

A friend of mine told me to start listening to "After Hours" on NJ 101.5 so I do on a fairly regular basis when I'm in my car at night. Anyway, one of the discussion points this week was "When is it okay to say 'I Love You' '". The host correctly (in my opinion) stated that women say it too easily and when a guy doesn't say anything back, the relationship isn't going anywhere so you should break it off. Michelle, the host, also stated that women need to let the guy say it first. I totally agree that we need to learn to wait for him to say it. Truly, depending on how long you've known each other (friends time included) it should take between three and six months.

Unfortunately the first time a guy said it to me, it was 2 weeks into dating. This time I was the one who didn't say it back and thereafter I couldn't wait to get out of the relationship, it was as good as tolling the death bell on our courtship. When I relayed this story to my friend who listens to Michele he said "yeah it's possible that a guy could say that very quickly".

Why write about this today, you ask? Well since I work in a place that has people from all over one of the staffers who's still learning English replied "Maggie love you too" when I wished him a good day. I smiled and said thank you and got back to work. Yesterday he asked me if I had a husband so you can see where I'm going with this...

Anyway, I decided to update my status on Facebook/MySpace to "in a relationship" just because. It's mainly because I am under contract for my place which is the biggest commitment I've ever made so I think semantics-wise I'm justified in my change.

Dude, Leave Those Lightbulbs!

I had a dream the other night, that I walked into my place for the first time and the previous owner had taken all the light bulbs with him! This is the first dream I've had about my hopeful future house. I certainly hope this is the only weird one. Despite the fact that I have an active imagination, I have a weird feeling about the day of closing on my house.

It could go smoothly and I get the keys, have the locksmith meet me there and I change the locks right away. Bad case scenario, the buyer closes but then says there's still personal stuff in the house. Then it gets awkward; I mean I gave them an extra two months to get what's left (and there wasn't much the last time). I pretty much plan on going there directly after the closing so I'd rather not have any more delay, and I certainly don't want to have to serve them with a trespassing notice. But these are the things I'm bracing myself for on closing day.

Anyway, now that I'm officially absolutely sick of shopping for my house, yes that's possible apparently .I cannot think of another thing I need except for paper napkins. I plan on sleeping on my aerobed for a while until I get furniture. There's still an inner-debate about whether it's Raymour/Flanigan or Crate/Barrell. Basically it comes down to whether or not I want assembled furniture, which I do of course.I'm just waiting waiting waiting for another 54 days. In between then, I have a semester to finish, people to pass and fail, a quick holiday trip down to the shore, and exercise to do and water to drink.

I'm So Cranky...

I'm avoiding the mountain of grading I have beside me to sit and vent about the exhausting process of buying stuff for my first place. I was suppose to get at least half this crap when I moved away for college, which I never did, my sister's pointed out. The rest I was suppose to get when I registered to get married. So I guess you could say I'm doing things out of order. The good news is, when I do get married and register, I can register for nicer things I can't buy now.

Since I'm homeowner-party of one- I'm responsible for purchasing everything from a can opener to bars of soap and EVERYTHING in between. Thank goodness my new job pay is solid because I'm actually sick and tired of trying to remember what I still "need" to start my house out properly. I've been tracking my spending on a spreadsheet to make sure I don't double-buy.

Last weekend, I got a birthday trip to Costco when my sister bought my sundries like paper products and soap. This weekend I hit Wal-Mart hard for everything from a dust pan to a GSCI outlet for the kitchen so I don't electrocute myself when I'm washing dishes and the oven's on. I also decided to go the digital light timer route instead of the old-fashion dialed thingy which still baffles me. Speaking of baffling, I cannot believe how much stuff I can actually fit in my closet here and in the attic. It's insane how good I've gotten at condensing things.

I decided to take a leap and book the moving truck from U-Haul this week. After I got two letters my lawyer sent out to the Seller to stop being un-cooperative and let certain appraisals and repairs get done, my agent sent me a very hopeful text: appraisal done, contracts signed. Yeah! This was as exciting as getting a telegram (not that I'd know what that feels like in this day of e-mail and texting). ANYWAY, it paid to walk off my anxiety and uncertainty that this is actually going to happen because there's not much else I can do except focus on my work and wait for the next 55 days to pass me buy. I should be grateful I don't have mortgage to pay for two more months but still, I went upstairs today just to touch the stuff I bought as comfort that one day it will be unpacked and actually used.

This distraction has helped me keep another matter off my mind. I had dinner with George last Sunday night after church. I told him about my dilemma with the guy I like and he said "Maggie you just have to kiss him!" This is soooo easier said than do with me. First of all, I haven't really wanted to kiss him yet so doing that would be a huge boundary pusher for me. It feels like I'm opening Pandora's box. Then again, Pandora's box contained HOPE besides the evils of mankind.

Anyway, I am taking my b.i.c.'s advice and letting this guy come and find me. I think he's warming up to me but I'm really really tired of pretending like it's okay that I always have to make contact and he makes the plans to hang out. Then again he's got enough going on the next couple of weeks and so do I. So word on the street is, Maggie's still single but maybe not for long???? I love starting rumors because they usually turn out to be true :)

Spring Letter

Spring Letter – April 2008
I was planning on using this letter to announce happy news of a different kind. As you may remember, last year’s letter said I was applying to study full-time for a Ph.D. in English beginning this fall. Well, the bad news is I didn’t get in anywhere I applied. The great news is, I have a new job and plan on closing on my first home purchase in the coming weeks AND I became an aunt for the first time… all within a month! When it rains it pours (especially in March and April in New Jersey)!!
Let’s start with the new job. I’m working for the Lotos Club (www.lotosclub.org) on E. 66th St. in NYC in their Membership office. Basically it’s a country club without a golf course. I look forward to the challenge of switching from a small tech. company to a small social club. And of course, it’s great to have such a lovely park (Can you guess which one?) nearby to walk in during lunch. While I can’t say I’ll ever afford to shop in this new work neighborhood, it will be nice to work in a different part of the city.
I still teach part-time at Union County College as a freshmen composition professor. Many of my friends and students ask me “Why don’t you teach full-time?” The simple answer is, there are many college level teachers with similar or better qualifications in my field. I’d hoped to use a Ph.D. to get full-time work but it appears that’s not the career path I should take. I accepted this once the four out of the six rejection letters headed to my mailbox during the past few weeks. I’m very lucky to have the opportunity to teach on my schedule, it’s a good balance to working as an administrative assistant during the day.
One of my goals has been to buy my first place before I turned 30 and never have to rent. Well, if everything continues to go move in my favor, I will be the proud owner of a ~500 sq. ft. one bedroom condo in Iselin, NJ (near the MetroPark train station) by the end of May. I’d been looking at buying a condo for the last six months as my back-up plan if graduate school didn’t pan out. The irony of my situation is I had terrible GRE test scores but an outstanding credit score. While shopping for a mortgage, it was such a boost to hear lenders say right away, “You have great credit; we’ll have no problem getting you a mortgage.” I’m very lucky that in these credit crunch times and falling housing prices, I can finally enter the real estate market. While the unit I’ve chosen is in move in condition, there are a lot of cosmetic changes to make. Since this is my first place, I plan to put in a LOT of sweat equity work. I’ll let you know if HGTV ends up filming my efforts J.
Last, but not least, the most joyful news: bragging about becoming an aunt. Benjamin Thomas Dening (aka “The Little Engine that Could” to me) was born at Morristown Hospital on February 26th six weeks early at 3lbs 9.5 oz and 16” long. He’s had only one surgery (hernia, very common for pre-mature babies) and eats like a champ every three hours. I’ve haven’t held him that much yet but I’m sure I’ll have a lot of time to do that in the near future. He came home from the hospital on March 16th.
Well that should catch you up on my life this past year. If you’d like more current updates and pictures, please visit my blog at: givenry.blogspot.com
Best wishes, Maggie