I'm Addicted to Netflix

I finally gave into the banner ad and joined Netflix. I decided that when I move I'm not going to get a full cable package, just basic. I'm going to watch my fav. cable shows online and watch a LOT of shows on DVD that I've missed over the years or just plain miss. I have 89 DVDs on my lists which include: House, the Office, PeeWee's Playhouse, Inspector Gadget, Sports Night.

I think I love watching DVDs almost as much I love reading but not as much as I enjoy cooking. It's all a balance.

Rebel without a Clue

Thank you George for giving me the title to this latest entry! I spent most of the holiday weekend with a guy friend Steve at the jersey shore. For someone who had major surgery on his leg within the last eight weeks, we sure walked a lot! He admits he's not much of a talker (an ex once labeled him as "aloof") but there are two things he will talk about: the Marines and the women's he's dated. As one who's interested in stories about relationships I break a major conversational taboo and let anyone who wants to share their "ex stories". Well Steve has two in particular that puzzle him. The first is this girl he labeled as "Summit Chick". She was well educated and had a good job but when it came to Steve she eventually began arguing with him because, as she put it "you can't be broken". Hello Summit chick, a Marine cannot be broken anymore than he already was in basic training at Paris Island!

The next ex we debriefed on was "Broadway Chick." I forgot how they met but their brief courtship left Steve completely clueless. It turned out she'd never been asked out before and didn't know what to do, plus she had body image issues. Unfortunately this came to a head when Steve planned a really romantic date and he got her to talk about her ambivalane to dating .


Steve's a great catch and I think these two women gave him the wrong deal. The only caveat with him is his work requires a lot of overtime and an unpredictable schedule. But when he actually spends time with you, it's quality time and he's a gentleman. Anyway, I can understand his frustration is probably not making him want to get out there and meet more women. As he says "the women I meet are either too young and old". All weekend at the shore town, older women were hitting on him left and right (on the Boardwalk and at church mostly). I really want to be his yenta and find him a nice girl. I just hope he's learned from all these experiences that he has to find a balance between pursuit and not trying too hard.

You Just Have to Stand There

Okay so many of you may be thinking of the Beatles song "I Saw Her Standing There" when you see the headline to my latest blog entry here. But it's not really what I'm thinking. Last night I watched a Carlos Mencia special on Comedy Central- one of his last bits was on how women just have to stand there when they meet guys. It's the guys who have to approach you, hit on you, buy you a drink, etc.

Then it's our call whether or not we're interested. So he imitates a guy trying to pick up women in a bar, unsuccessfully by the way, and it always ends with "thank you very much" no matter what happens the guy HAS to be polite. It's true- kindness goes further than rudeness for a woman.

Me and the Real Guy

I realized today that both my match.com and eharmony profiles are still "active" on their matrix and I decided to have them deleted. I've been getting winks from match.com and it was kinda weirding me out. Then I ran into one of my eHarmony matches at church on Sunday. I pointed him out to George and said "yeah once he found out I wasn't to into water he stopped talking to me". Lucky for George as the smile on his face confirmed as we walked into the service.

Have you ever been a situation (dating, work, social) where you went through the motions just to say you did it but really you wanted to be somewhere or with someone else. That's what online dating was like for me. I felt like I was hounding my email box searching for that next message from one of my matches. The ones from Match.com came more frequently than the eHarmony ones. I remember this time last year getting an email from one of my eHarmony matches talking about who knows what, he lived in CT and wasn't too kean on church (a Joel Osteen fan errrgh) but still I was chatting with him hoping beyond hope it would turn into something.

What I've realized with George is that he actually wants to spend time with me that's why he pursues me. None of my matches really knew "me" the way he does, the real life version of me. Not the blow up doll that an online dating profile makes you look. Sure my personality comes through a bit but truly it's not designed for people like me who can clearly express themselves in words.

I was watching "Lars and Real Girl" and to some extent understood why he wanted to have that virtual relationship. He wanted a connection to someone (of the opposite sex) who wasn't obligated by familial bond to chose to be with him. Bianca, his doll love, is what he (and eventually his neighbors/friends in town) make her.

Since I've known George for many years, although I can't remember clearly the first Sunday we met. Oh yeah I do actually, he was getting out of his friend's car as I was and we walked in all together to sit in church. Anyway, since we've been friends for a while and regularly communicate he was the first person I called when I broke up with my last boyfriend. I waited a whole two days to call George on the premise of taking him out to dinner since I missed his birthday party. Anyway, I was sitting there thinking "God this is the guy I should be dating" and then I let it go. I bugged our mutual friend to help me out but he said George takes him time with important things like that so I had to wait until George was ready to pursue me. I think what helped him along was my making his birthday cake this year and buying him a girlfriend-esque present of a polo shirt. The best purchase (besides my condo) I've ever made- it's paying off in dividends of happiness.

You Have to Go Backwards to Go Forward

This is how I describe my theory of time in the Chronicles of Narnia, Prince Caspian the movie. George was like "what?" when I blurted this out the first time. It was late in the day so I might have made absolutely no sense but I managed to get out an explanation. Basically the movie starts with the main characters having a dejavu moment.
I've had those a lot especially in my dreams, I'll dream I've done or met someone before it happens. Of course, I don't wake up and write down the dream. Instead it gets stored in the recesses of my long term memory and it pops up like a pop-up on my web browser.

Anyway, it's got me thinking about writing again. But it's just a thought now and I can't really articulate what sort of thesis I've have. I think I'll plead the 5th and keep it to myself for now...

A mini high school reunion

Last night, I met up with two girls, Allie and Sarah, I went to high school with to have drinks and dinner in M'Town. We haven't seen each other in at least 4 years and just in passing at a store so it was nice to actually have a real conversation with them.

After gushing about George for a minute we talked about all the "mean girls" from elementary school on and how when we see them now they try and pretend that the words they said didn't' mean anything. But they still do. Even the guys that teased them and are now trying to flirt with Allie and Sarah when they go out to drink in Hoboken, we will never forget those words.

At intervals I was left alone with one of them and they gossiped about the other. I've known Allie longer and she mainly talked to me about the love of her life, Davy. They met years ago and she regrets that she was immature and didn't have it together. The two still talk and he's asked to be single for the summer (she admits to being a drama queen) so she's waiting for summer to be over with.

The other amusing thing we talked about was the church across the street. Since they live in the neighborhood they noticed the Christian bookstore that's related to the church that meets Sundays at the hotel off the Green.

Anyway, I told them that's where George and I met. Sarah proceeds to immediately ask me " So what are your thoughts on pre-marital sex?" It's a good thing I had a drink and a half in me and some dinner so I could gracefully handle that question. She did preface it with "Do you mind if I ask you a personal question?". Anyway I said one of my boyfriend's had pressured me to do it and I almost did but didn't at the last second and he respected my wishes and proceeded to break up with me a few weeks later.

I told them that it's hard to wait(girls our age think it about more than guys think we do) and I know Christians who aren't virgins when they get married. The thing I didn't say and probably should of was that they became believers late in life. But since I was talking to two recovering Catholics it didn't seem like the right place to sermonize on sexual purity. I can just tell though that to some extent, both of these beautiful girls who spend every weekend getting wasted (their words not mine) I can see they wish they had some sort of prince charming in their life. Maybe they've already met him and they just didn't know it, I hope.

Big Bang Theory and George

I asked George yesterday if we could watch "Big Bang Theory" when it comes out on DVD and he didn't say anything. When I asked again later on the phone, he admitted ambivalence because it struck too close to his academic life as an undergrad. Apparently he studied/lived with guys who talked just like that and he wasn't like them at all.

While I can't say I'm the Penny character in one of my groups of friends (the one I actually met George in), I have my moments when I want to say to them "Seriously guys, you really know every detail about Battlestar Gallactica"?" I have to be VERY careful what I say about BG because if I'm not mistaken it's George's favorite shows.

Speaking of which, we were talking about the shows we watched as children and he mentioned Carl Sagan's "Cosmos" because he knows how much I like(d) astronomy. Apparently I missed out on one of the best documentaries on the subject. It almost makes me want to take my tiny telescope out from under my parent's bed (dont' ask me why it's there) and set it up in my new place, just maybe I will.

Privacy

How many minutes of your day is actually spent in privacy? So far I can count about 20 when I was driving to the train station. The rest of it so far as been spent with strangers and co-workers alike. I've been in closer proximity to strangers than I've ever been with George. Between that and the 7 minutes it takes for me to take my daily shower, I'm pretty much surrounded by humanity.
Yesterday I read an article about this buddhist couple who has vowed to stay no more than 15 feet apart at all times. They claim they're not intimately involved and they're doing it to lessen their innate selfishness.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/15/garden/15buddhists.html?ex=1368590400&en=babf2f046e13bf6b&ei=5124&partner=permalink&exprod=permalink


Throughout my day I leave little traces of my path that I didn't really think about until now. The MTA knows exactly where I get on and off and at what time. My cell carrier knows exactly where I am as long as my phone's turn on and has a signal. My mother always knows where I am and occasionally does the "where are you going, where have you been?" Otherwise I guess the doorman at my building where I work knows my comings and going for most of my work day.

Web Diva

George is insisting on calling me "Web Diva" and thinks I'm better suited as a IT chicka than merely the social secretary I currently work as. I have no idea where he gets it from? He even gave me a copy of "Cuckoo's Egg" to read, perhaps to get the wheels already spinning in my head about a million other things geared into the direction of computers. It's enough that I stare as a monitor 8 hours a day (yes I watch TV online at lunch). But my vision of being an IT person invovles a matrix of codes and carrots and tildas.

I suppose I should be flattered that he envisions me in this job but it would be like me taking my love of baking and becoming a pastry chef. A hobby would become a chore and I'd probably end up very unhappy.

The one thing that baffles me about computers and technology is the lack of transparency (for lack of a better word) in regards to music files. I cannot believe I have a couple hundred dollars worth of iTunes tracks that will not play on my new player. I guess I learned my lesson that Apple's is just as serious about making as much $$ off of you as Microsoft.

That doesn't excuse the fact that I love all the stuff on my old now dead iPod, whatever worthless piece of crap that it is now.

What I love about technology is also what I hate: it's portability and replacement ease. I cannot tell you how much crap I got when my first iPod (a gift from Mom) broke like 4 weeks in. I was so embarrased or shamed as it was.

Now I have a cute little pink $30 (thank you Staples rebates) Sony Walkman. Go figure that they can still make a damn good product. I should'nt be so surprised though.

Anyway, so I thought more about what George said tonight as I wait for this final exam proctoring to be OVER, yeah I'm really checking them and blogging at the same time.

I think I can actually do this and I totally can't believe I never though of this as a resume builder before. He's going to get such a good commission for suggesting this idea. But he better be prepared for the consequences of this--- I'll actually have to do some coursework studying/practice which could cut into our "us" time. I don't know if he thought of that. Anyway, how hard could it actually be? Maybe I'm over-thinking this and George has nothing to worry about.

He was so awesome today in the supportive department. Actually there's very few days since we met many Sundays ago that he hasn't. I guess I'm supporting him in my own way but he seems so grounded and has his shit together (yes I'm cursing) that I guess all I have to do is continue to accept him for who he is, as he is. That's all I'm going to say about us, I promised him there'd be no pillow talk or any other kind about us on my blog.

The Co-Op Registry

I was having dinner with friends on Saturday and two of us are moving into our first place (buying that is) and we talked about how we wished as singleton's we could still have a registry. Since he's a guy and I'm a girl I said we should register together. We had a good laugh about the logistics of it all because he's living at the shore and I'm moving to a more suburban area. I continued the "what if" with well we need things for BOTH residences, silly.

This was me hung-over from the night before, silly tired but being propped up by my very nicely dressed and well behaved date, George. He's been really supportive about my whole buying on my own but perhaps this was too much to expect from him. He never said anything later so I'm sure he took it in the spirit it was meant, silly but rational reasoning.

By the way, if you do feel compelled to buy me anything ever, I'm registered on Amazon.com :)

You Can Only Love One Place at a Time

People who know me well know how much I really really love being in the city every work day. I love the layers of sounds I can heard my MP3 player, then the sounds of a cab printing out a receipt, people's snippets of conversation....


Last Friday, I once again joined the Happy Hour crowd that I used to be with before I left in 2006. We always end up in Hell's Kitchen, this time at Mr. Bigg's (10th and 43rd). The tab for 4 came to $74, thanks to the 2-1 drinks and 1/2 price appetizers, I think that's our new watering hole. As usual I was the only girl so it was all high fives around and talking about work mostly. I was one of 4 people actually happy with their current job.